Many people mistakenly think marriages are positive a majority of the time. The truth is marriage can be a lot of work and many couples go through periods of conflict and discord regularly. Seeing marriage counselors in New York City can be one of the best ways to learn how to handle these conflicts as they arise. Marriage counseling in NYC can lay a solid foundation for good communication and a positive resolution to all of your conflicts.
Fight Fair
One of the best tips marriage counselors in NYC will offer is to always fight fair. Some individuals like to pull out situations that happened in the past or other things they know will hurt the other party.
This is the fastest way to deteriorate your relationship. It’s best to stay in the present and work toward a fair resolution for everyone instead of taking low blows and trying to make the other person angry. Do your best to give one another all your attention, showing this by facing each other and maintaining eye contact.
Take a Time Out
For some people, a fast resolution is more important than anything, but a fast resolution does not always mean a long-lasting one. Marriage counseling in New York City can help you see how important it can be to take a step back and let emotions settle before taking the next step. Sometimes it’s better for everyone involved if you take a little time apart to cool off before you discuss a resolution to your problem.
Use Positive Statements
It can often be difficult to think positively when you are in the midst of a conflict. However, it’s the best way to get to a resolution as quickly as possible. Instead of considering throwing in the towel, strive to work on a solution to the problem together. Avoid criticizing or attacking the other person and try to take a positive approach. It is also better to say how behaviors make you feel, rather than attacking the behavior itself, which can put the other party on the defensive. You want to foreground your experience without brushing aside the experience of your significant other. Positivity in the face of conflict can help make that happen.
Listen to One Another
You may have heard this one more times than you can count, but it really brings positive results. When you are in conflict, you need to sit down, explain to each other what is bothering you and listen to each other’s concerns without immediately reacting. Few things provoke and exacerbate tensions like the feeling of not being heard. Simple phrases such as “I hear you” or questions like “Can you tell me more?” are great ways to show that you are actively listening and not just thinking about a response.
Stop Conflict With a Relationship Counselor in NYC
Marriage Couples Counseling in NYC works hard to help you learn how to resolve your conflicts fairly and quickly. Many couples aren’t sure how to handle conflicts that come their way because they have a distorted vision of what marriage should be. For these individuals, marriage counseling in New York City can help them adjust their way of fighting and help them work toward conflict resolution together, rather than fighting against each other. Contact us today at 212-673-4618 and get your relationship back on track.